This past week, Q-line asked:
The City Council recently approved a net that will be installed under the Santa Monica Pier to prevent pigeons from fouling the bay, which is home to some of the most polluted waters in California. This has animal rights activists in an uproar, with some claiming the net could kill or injure the birds who roost underneath the famous structure. Do you think the net is a good idea and why?
Here are your responses:
“The pigeons were here first. I say remove the pier.”
“Never mind the pigeons; if you want to get rid of the pollution, get rid of the bums. The drunken bums cause more pollution than any pigeons do.”
“No, I don’t think the net is a good idea. It is inhumane to trap mature birds and young fledglings under it. There are certainly more humane ways of dealing with the problem. What about the human waste that finds its way into these waters and has for years? Put the net over the peeing, pooping and vomiting bums.”
“Yes, the net should be installed. Screw the activists — pigeons are flying vermin. In fact, I’m in favor of giving everyone on the Third Street Promenade or the pier who wants one a nail on a stick to stab the little suckers and toss them into a trash bin.”
“I say put up the net. A few less pigeons would be a bonus. We could also do with a few less animal rights activists. They’re about as obnoxious and useless as the crows — now there’s a problem.”
“Yes, I believe in controlling pollution of the bay. But even though I’m an animal rights activist, kind of, I think putting the net under the pier is a good idea. I’m sure the people who are doing it are being guided by the people that believe in animal rights. I’m an animal rights believer, but not for humans.”
“I am a Santa Monica person, and I really think that net should be for the pigeons. It’ s not going to hurt them and I think it’s going to be better for the pier. But I have one other suggestion: What about the pigeons on the promenade? When you’re eating out, they fly all over you. Can’t you do something about that too?”
“We can feed the homeless and solve our pigeon problem with this recipe: Homeless Squab Flambé. Take one pigeon and marinate with cheap beer or whiskey, add a dash of crack or heroine to taste, cook over burning trash can until well done. This recipe can also be used for squirrel or rat.”
“If any question completely defines Santa Monica, this is it. This sounds like a fund-raiser for Heal the Bay. No one swims under the pier. These animal rights people have got too much time on their hands, or are trying to justify their salaries or non-profit status. Pigeons are just rats with wings. Here is a great example of non-clarity and no common sense from the misguided. Instead of worrying about pigeon poop, we should be concentrating on the obscene, half-a-billion-dollar budget, and the explosive, ruinous growth. Pigeon poop will now compete with bum poop, educational poop, so-called entertainment poop on the mall, poopy low-income housing, light rail poop and the best is the poop from City Hall: obfuscation, hubris and greed. Clean up this town. Get a bum to eat a pigeon.”
“The City Council once again shows us what idiots they are. They just spent a large sum to replace the pipes under the pier, and the Heal the Bay water sample still rates the pier D at best and F most of the time in dry weather. Now they are blaming this on birds. Looks like they could have saved a lot of money on pipes. Walk under the pier, and see how many water leaks are always coming from above. Next election, vote everyone out but Shriver.”
“I do think the net’s a great idea, because all pigeons do is defecate all over the place and make a mess, and they’re not worth anything. If it was seagulls, if it was cranes, or pelicans, I would say no. But there’s enough pigeons on the promenade and in the park. Let them stay there, and let’s keep the water clean. I’ve been in Santa Monica for 30 years, and I haven’t gone in the water for 25 because of the pollution.”
“I have one question for the Q-Line and the City Council: Why do they pick the least humane way to handle some kind of animal issue? They poisoned those little squirrels and animals in the Pacific Palisades when there was a humane option available. There’s also a humane option available to this net, and they’re totally ignoring it. They’re the poo in the net.”
“The net is a terrible idea, especially from a city that prides itself on being an environmental Mecca. Has the California Coastal Commission given permission? What about the Department of Fish and Game? Not only are we talking about pigeons, but what about the seagulls, wandering pelicans and migratory fowl that could be caught in this net? It’s almost like Sarah Palin authorizing aerial shooting of wolves. Come on, Santa Monica can come up with something better — maybe completing the construction authorized in Measure B so the real cause of the pollution, our sewage, is stopped. The pigeons are like a drop in the bucket; it’s the rest of us that are causing the pollution, and Santa Monica needs to stop that, not by killing birds.”