Recognized as America’s foremost humorist, Mark Twain did not have a terribly high opinion of humans when he said, “Man is the only animal in all of God’s creatures that is cruel. Man is also the only animal who blushes. Or needs to.” Cruel humans, however, don’t blush or have remorse because they don’t have a conscience.

Speaking of Donald Trump (or as federal prosecutors in the Southern District call him “Individual-1”) he recently executed a purge of Homeland Security, God forbid there’s a real attack. This house cleaning included the firing of Secret Service Director Randolph Alles, despite Trump’s having lavished praise on the department only weeks ago.

Reportedly, among Trump’s criticisms of Alles was his large ears, which prompted Individual-1 to refer to him as “Dumbo.” Imagine, Trump, the most obese president since Taft,  and with hair that looks like cotton candy, callously attacks the appearance of others.

Trump’s sadistic cruelty included his mocking a severely disabled reporter to the delight of Individual-1’s rabid supporters. He also ridiculed the late Charles Krauthammer, a respected conservative commentator.

As a medical student, Krauthhammer suffered a tragic diving accident which left him in a wheel chair for the rest of his life. Because he had the audacity to criticize Trump’s policies thin-skinned Individual-1 responded,   “I created an empire and this guy can’t even buy a pair of pants.” (I’m coining a new adjective, “trumpvicious.”)

Speaking of white nationalists (how’s that for a segue?), that brings me to Santa Monica’s own, Stephen Miller who, at 33, has ascended to Trump’s “immigration czar.” Miller, who bears a striking resemblance to the infamous Roy Cohn, Joseph McCarthy’s hatchet man during the “red scare” of the 1950’s. After being disbarred and disgraced, Cohn became Trump’s mentor. Figures. Meanwhile, Miller even dresses like Cohn with his  retro “skinny suits” and soulless facial expressions.

Stevie’s pet project is his inhumane family separation policy and putting kids in cages policies. While there’s no truth to the rumor that at Samohi Miller was voted “Most Likely to Rip Babies from their Mothers,” he’s largely responsible for doing just that.

Like his boss, Miller’s an authoritarian to his core and actually said of Trump’s national security actions, “The president’s power will not be questioned.” (Wrong! The president’s power is always open to question by checks and balances and co-equal branches of government.)    

Going back to his Samohi days, Miller stood out from the vast majority of his classmates because of his racist views, chiefly directed at Latinos. For example, if two students were talking to each other in Spanish, Miller would vehemently reprimand them to the effect that this is America and here we speak English!

Samohi has long been famous for its diversity. Miller was famous for his intolerance. At a student government event, Miller rhetorically asked his classmates if anyone else was sick and tired of being chastised for not picking up their trash on the lunch court.  He shouted,  “That’s what we have janitors for! ” (The janitors were primarily Latino.)

No wonder, Miller was unceremoniously booed off the stage. He later said he “was just joking.” Forgive me, but little Stevie doesn’t look like he’s ever joked in his life. Or smiled, for that matter.  There are a myriad of other examples of Miller’s hatred of minorities, including abruptly ending a personal friendship.  According to Jason Islas, in the summer between middle and junior high, Miller told him, “I can’t be your friend anymore because you are Latino.”

As Islas told Univision, the two never spoke again. “It didn’t bother me, because the fact that Miller rejected me because I am Latino showed me he was pretty much worthless.” Ouch.

In the past, I may have been a little harsh on Stevie as I recently pointed out that,  to hide his ever receding hairline, he was actually using “hair paint.” I joked his barber’s name was Sherman Williams. Meanwhile, under the hot TV lights the paint appeared to bubble and it looked like his hair was actually growing.   

Kidding aside,  Islas stressed how cruel Miller could be and how he took joy in causing others misery. In that regard, he and Individual-1 are a match made in revenge heaven. Trump has even suggested getting even is better than sex. (Giving us an insight into his love-making skills, as awful as that subject is to contemplate.)   As for Miller, even some prominent Republicans can’t stand him.

Senator Lindsey Graham said, “As long as Stephen Miller is in charge of negotiating on immigration, we are going nowhere.”  Senator Chuck Grassley added, “I think it would be hard for him to demonstrate he’s accomplished anything for the president.” 

Personally, the nicest thing I can say about Miller is that it appears he’s stopped using hair paint.

For more, Google “YouTube Stephen Miller janitors.”  Jack is at:, and

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  1. What I most want to know is what was it in the SMMUSD that happened to miller to make him such miserable human bring.

    Or is it because Miller was just a rotten kid who grew in to be a rotten adult in government?

    No disrespect intended to all human beings by asdociation.

  2. This PUKE Miller’s puss is a shining example of what to use when you run out of TP (like we’re all likely to, these days) and stranded on the porcelain throne after a productive session … 😉

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