Mother’s Day can be a difficult holiday when you’ve lost your mom, regardless of the amount of time that has passed. Understanding this, I thought I’d share several ways that we at Gates, Kingsley & Gates Moeller Murphy Funeral Directors have found to make remembering mom a time of healing.

Already it’s hard not to see Mother’s Day cards virtually everywhere you shop. Instead of trying to avoid them, go ahead and buy a card that captures your feelings. Tap into memories and write a note in the card. You can bring the card to your mother’s gravesite or keep it in a special place at home. You might consider buying an extra card and visiting a senior in a nursing home or senior center who might not otherwise have any visitors.

On Mother’s Day, consider setting an extra place at the dinner table for mom. By including her in this way, you can honor her memory and share warm thoughts of how she made a difference in your life — quietly or with other family members at the table.

Bring flowers to your mother’s gravesite on Mother’s Day. It is a lovely way to pay tribute and spend some quiet time remembering special moments. If your mother’s gravesite is in another state, ask the cemetery about placing a floral arrangement for you.

Many moms leave a legacy of giving, having worked with one or more charities during their lifetimes. Keep your mom’s legacy alive by volunteering with her charity or one that holds a special meaning to you and your family this Mother’s Day weekend.

Missing your mother is natural and even more so this time of year. I hope that these ideas will help you honor your mom in whatever way you need, and that they will help make this year’s holiday more about remembrance than loss.


Jeffrey Baker

General manager, Gates, Kingsley & Gates Moeller Murphy Funeral Directors

Santa Monica

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